Each one of us is equipped with a symbolic energy tank. Week by week our tanks get filled and then get emptied by a whole host of events and experiences.
Physicians are especially prone to have our tanks emptied by patients, phone calls, texts, emails, instant messages, reports, documents, and other clinical demands. Our home life can have the same effect, filling or emptying our tank. How we view ourselves, and our deeper sense of purpose even impacts our tank. For many, change tends to be a tank emptier, although some are energized by it. In an odd paradox, many physicians around the country are seeing fewer patients due to the pandemic, but they feel more exhausted at the end of each day. If you haven’t figured this out yet, it’s due to the undercurrent of change.
The COVID-19 Pandemic, and its associated day-to-day changes in our life, have brought about a host of challenges for every American. However, it has especially assaulted the well-being of physicians, who prior to this pandemic, had already begun to feel the ugly shadow of burnout cast upon them.
Right now, we just need a roadmap to help us see some daylight and hope. I want you to take a deep breath, and follow these steps for self-care. This will help ensure you don’t become a casualty of our profession, even if you are fortunate enough to avoid becoming a casualty of the virus.
I have broken this down into a day-to-day process that will lead to deposits being made in your energy tank, rather than withdrawals.
Monday: Look For The Purpose
Mondays have a way of setting the tone for the week. No matter the challenges of last week, or how hard the weekend was, Monday affords the opportunity to start fresh. For most physicians, our greatest driving force remains to help a patient with a broken area of their life.
When we can walk away from a patient encounter knowing that we did something that made a difference for them, it fills our tank.
Start the week off by filling your tank with some self-awareness that you are bettering the lives of people with your medical touch. There are so many signals from patients that demonstrate this including a look, hug, handshake, smile, card, a thank you, and even tears. Look for the signals and choose to joyfully savor those moments on this day.
If you really get enthusiastic about it, tell a HIPPA compliant story about one of these patient encounters to your family when you get home. They will enjoy seeing you light up over the deeper purpose of why you work so hard in medicine.
Tuesday: Count Your Blessings
Regardless of the circumstantial hardships that we find ourselves in, there is always something to be thankful for in life. On your way into work today, identify something you are grateful for.
Write it down, and share this with someone today, anyone. Pausing to reflect on gratitude is one step, sharing it with another human in your world existentially takes it to a whole other level in your soul. It tends to fill the tank even further.
Wednesday: Take Care of Number 1
Only you know the answer, but something fills your tank personally, and today you need to do that thing. Physicians are taught self-denial and delayed gratification as part of our code of honor. So it’s really hard to do something purely for yourself. But today is that one day of the week, that I want you to think about YOU.
It could be a simple choice to start your work shift an hour late or cut out an hour early. Physicians know how to maximize time, so an extra hour of self-time is a treasure.
The reality is that from here the spectrum of what fills the tank is as broad as our personality spectrum. Alone time or a small gathering, quiet meditation or a game of cards, going for a walk, run, bike, or boat trip.
Simply reading a book in a secluded place. Watch a movie, paint a picture, write in your diary. For me, having a date with my wife really does the job.
You have to know yourself and love yourself enough to do what is needed to fill that tank.
Thursday: Connect with Others
Small gatherings with friends or families that still respect social distancing rules can be enriching. We have a nice front porch on our home that faces main street. We can all sit on the porch, separated safely, yet talk and relax together as a family.
Technology can keep you from feeling isolated and lonely. Text a friend, call a family member or try a video chat. Checking in can make both of you feel better.
If you are used to being connected with a community of faith, make sure to tap into their online connection options. There are many sources that can be richly accessed on your digital device.
The love of others, especially family and close friends, has a way of filling our tanks like nothing else.
Friday: Relax and Reflect
The end of the week allows one to take a deep breath and look back at what has transpired during the week.
There are often lessons learned, painful moments shared, therapeutic triumphs, and human experiences that touch us deeply. Either write down, or verbally express these moments with your partner. Remember to do this after you have been able to put yourself in a place of relaxation. Whether it’s taking a breath using aromatherapy, listening to calming music, or sipping a cup of tea, or even taking a dip in the hot tub – take a moment to pause and fill your senses with something that soothes you!
Know your personal limits. Everyone will come to the end of themself, and relaxing and reflecting has a way of refueling us. Take a moment to fill your tank via tranquility.
Saturday: Rest
As far as it is possible, find rest in this day.
Put down your “to do” and task lists. Let the grass grow another day, and give those weeds a few extra moments. Today you need to do all you can to make sure your tank is able to naturally fill by resting. Our creator built rest into the cycle of life, including days and nights as well as a rhythmic calendar of days. Humans were not created to endlessly work. Meaningful work and meaningful rest are necessary companions for sustainability and balance. You must know your limits, and know the power of resting. Practicing how to empty our minds through prayer, meditation, yoga and other relaxation techniques are powerful methods to bring us rest.
If you will practice this tank filler, most will find rest actually leads to more productivity the other 6 days of the week.
Some of you need a deeper rest, and you should consider a sabbatical. With the economic downturn spilling into healthcare, many employers are offering a range of reduced workload and sabbatical options for their employees. This might be a good time to really get away from the pressures, and heal before returning to the healthcare battlefield.
Sunday: Hold Tightly to What is Important to You
Savor the things that tend to breathe life into you. Practice your faith, connect with your maker, love your partner and family. Today choose to be present exactly where you find your tank getting filled to the greatest degree. Treasure those people and items that make you smile with deep pleasure. That dopamine surge will go a long way towards preparing you for the next week’s raiders of your tank. Reassure yourself that this safe and pleasurable space will be a rock for you week after week.
Now rinse and repeat as Monday draws near. Reassure yourself, you’ve got this, because you do!
If you are in a tough spot and need some more intensive help at this time due to the stress of COVID-19, I highly recommend The Happy MD and his resources, including The Pandemic Survival Guide For Physicians.
Dr. Inc.
